Thursday, September 3, 2009

Out of Control

"Until I lose my control for HIS control, I'm out of control...." these words took on a particular ring in my head this morning. My sweet mom posted these on my facebook wall sometime during the night so I could awaken to them. How does she always know what I need to hear?

In the pursuit of goals and pursuits, so often we begin well. We say, "OK, God. You and me. We got this. You just take control and I will follow right behind." And, what a blessing, He does! He pushes through all the walls before us, and we follow behind--careful to miss the debris. Slowly but surely the path grows easier (or so it seems from our limited perspective behind our LORD) so, like children, we begin to step around God in an effort to "help" lead.

Step by step we move from behind Him.......to beside Him.......into a full fledged attempt to "lead" our own path. "I've got this now, God," we tell Him. "I've got this under control."

Perhaps the path seems easy at first. After all, He's cleared the way. But then we begin to see road blocks and stumbling stones lying in the road. "I don't remember those being there before," we think as we try to maneuver around them. Suddenly there are more blocks.....we begin to feel our heels scraping against the stones set to deter us. The road isn't so fun anymore.

What began as a crusade toward a goal, led by the KING of KINGS, is now an obsession, a fear, a burden in our hands. We can't do it alone.....but if we relinquish control, what will happen? Will we lose all the progress we've made?!

STOP.
Don't take another step.
It's time to get out of the lead. We walk a dangerous road when we take God out of the headship role and try to lead by ourselves. How could I know? Because I am there.
I have had God in control of a situation in my life for several months now. But recently I began to step around Him...to usurp that authority and try to surpass Him as leader. The original goals have ballooned into something that has become a monster...controlling my every move and dictating even my emotions. What was a healthy dream became in my mind a nightmarish pursuit to keep what only God brought me. He brought it, and somehow I thought I had to keep and surpass it on my own. I have been out of control. Ironic, isn't it? Somehow we try to be in control, and actually find ourselves spinning madly, begging for the ride to stop? That's what happens when we take the control that only HE can have.
"Until I lose my control for His control, I'm out of control"
What are you hanging on to in your life? What have you tried to take from His grasp? Give it up, sweet one. Only by relinquishing it can He bring control and peace back to you. Only by becoming a slave to Him can He set you free.
I love you....I'm learning this day by day too. It's not easy, but it's for a reason.
Because He lives,
Sarah

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