Success

What do you deem success? When you reach the end of your life, will you feel “successful”? Do you think you are successful if you made a lot of money, were well known, lived your dreams, were surrounded by your closest companions, or were in love with your best friend?

Success….satisfaction…..contentedness….and thankfulness…..those are things I want to have at the end of my life. And success to me, as I am learning every day, is not getting to live my dreams, but cherish the life I have been given. “The miracle isn’t the life you wanted, it is the life you have” (The Shunning).

I may never get to travel to Europe like I have dreamed for many years. I may never get to teach in a women’s conference. I might never get to accomplish my “bucket list”…..but I have a beautiful life.

Sometimes I forget to be thankful for what I have when my shirt smells like spit-up, I have endless mounds of laundry, there are footprints on the floor (again), there is bread to make and dinner to plan, and I am so tired I feel I need a nap from waking up before the sun to nurse a growing little baby. But then I find I am ungrateful because I have been comparing my life to the lives of others!

That lady that always looks put together and wears designer clothes and carries a designer bag? Yeah....she doesn't have kids or if she does she doesn't cuddle them and smile when they regurgitate their milk on her shirt during church. (yes, this happened) She hasn't started throwing her wallet in the diaper bag because carrying a purse is just too much extra baggage to go to the grocery store. Doing laundry, I have found, builds character. Making bread? Makes me a chemist of the kitchen because I know how to coerce yeast to rise. Nursing a baby when my body wants to sleep? Makes me a mama....there is no greater joy than being a mama. 

Comparison is the killer of joy. 

I long to be successful at the end of my days. And sometimes being successful means I lose the plans I had for my life....lose my timetable....and surrender to the fact that it isn't my life. Success is giving your entire being over to the Lord and watching what He does. You are successful when, at the taking of your last breath, you have surrendered all and been awed at the miracle of the life you have, versus the life you dreamed of. 

I love my job.