Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Cornerstone Confessions

Each morning after their pledges, I hear the sweet voices of 2nd and 3rd graders as they recite their "school confessions" aloud. I don't think they completely think about the words they say, but their teacher does, and she is learning from it.

Cornerstone Confessions

Teach me Your ways, oh Lord.
 I am teachable.
I am quick, sharp, and bright.
I remember everything good.
I am healthy, strong, and prosperous.
I am a major blessing.
I have the favor of God.
I always do my best.
The Lord gives His angels charge over me to
protect me and keep me safe.
I know the truth; the truth sets me free.
For God has not given me a spirit of fear,
but of POWER, LOVE, and a SOUND mind.

Picture a class full of little voices yelling at the top of their lungs what I put into bold. It almost gives me chills. I wish they knew what they were proclaiming when they shouted so loudly. They are proclaiming good things over themselves-things of truth. They are asserting that they will do their best, that they won't be afraid because "greater is He who is in me than he who is in the world." (1 John 4:4)

"I am teachable"-I know that when these little voices say that phrase they aren't thinking spiritual thoughts. I know they probably aren't thinking at all! But to hear them say "I am teachable" reminds me that sometimes I am not teachable because I have a hard heart. I have been going through a spiritual desert lately, I'll be honest. I have poured out in women's BIble study, with still more to go, poured out in Sunday school teaching, poured out daily in teaching kiddos, and I am pouring out what few drops are left to my husband. I'll be honest, I don't have much more to give. I feel like I need a spiritual vacation where I sit and let someone dump into me for a while. *does that sound terribly selfish?* My life has completely changed in the last 11 weeks, and I am prayerfully adjusting. It takes time, and I feel like I am on overload. But as I look at the confession phrase again, it reminds me that I am not supposed to let my exhaustion close my heart to letting God teach me through this time. "I am teachable." God, make me teachable.

"I remember everything good...." Oh, how I need to make this true in my own life. To only remember the good, and to relenquish the bad to the One who can actually DO something about it. I have been struggling lately to forget bad things that have been happening to people I love, and to only remember good about the people hurting them. My sister is going through some difficult things with a relationship at her church, and she has been hurt deeply. I have found myself jumping up in anger for her, certain that the woman hurting her needs a good spanking. I have thought unkind thoughts, words, and names against this woman--forgetting that God wants me to remember everything good. Let Him have the woman, He's the one who will take care of both her and my sister. *sigh* I'm still learning.

" I am a major blessing." I wish I believed this all the time. Lately I have found myself using the two most difficult words against myself "good enough." I have laid certain specifications down that I feel I must meet to be a "good enough" wife, daughter, sister, teacher, and follower of God. I don't think I can adequately put into words how I have hurt my new found limitations and frustrations that have arisen with pregnancy and a COMPLETELY new stage in life. When things don't go as I plan, when I don't get everything done that I lay down for myself, then I am not "good enough." When my church manuscripts aren't finished, when I am struggling just to stay awake, when I feel like I am not meeting all my husband's needs, I find myself feeling less of a blessing and "not good enough." I love hearing these little children chant "I am a major blessing." Because, in truth, they are. Now, if I can only make myself belive it when the laundry isn't completely finished and my hair needs washing.

I wish you could hear "my" kiddos chant their confessions each morning--it might challenge you as it does me. I will remember these words long after I have our babies, and I can't wait to teach it to them.

Don't you love how God uses children to teach us?? "Of such is the Kingdom of Heaven......"

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