Hormonal Thoughts

Wow. I don't look as fat as I feel.

I can't see my toes--and it isn't my stomach that is blocking them.

When did watermelons grow on my chest???

I'm going to burst into tears. I have no idea why. 

WHY DOES MY HUSBAND WEAR SO MUCH UNDERWEAR THAT I HAVE TO WASH??

I'm hot.

I'm cold. 

Those dishes are breeding and multiplying, I just know it. 

Little student, please don't ask me yet ANOTHER question or I might cry. 

Why does brushing my teeth feel so awesome these days? 

Why won't my nail polish stay on? 

Why can't I stop picking my nails? 

I'm cold. 

 I'm hot. 

I'm hungry. 

Food tastes disgusting. 

WHY AM I CRYING???

Why am I laughing hysterically over a dumb joke? 

Why am I frustrated? 

Why am I awake at 5:30?

Is my bladder the size of a walnut? Is this why I have to go all the time??

Why am I sleepy? 

I know I'm hormonal--I just know it. 

I think there's a monkey in my head slamming cymbals together. 

Why am I stressed over ironing? 

This is why I am praying over my hormones.